Running Reflections

On Sunday, this picture popped up on my Timehop. It was a reminder of how far I've come in my journey as a runner. When I first started running, I weighed 230 pounds and every step I took was hard and painful. I was determined to keep running because it was the cheapest form of exercise I could do. At that point in my life, I knew that I had to do something. I hated the way that I looked, and I knew that I was very unhealthy. My family has a history of heart disease, diabetes, and cancer. At the rate I was going, I was going to end up with one or all of these if I didn't do something to get healthier. I called up my sister-in-law, Abby, and asked if she wanted to do a 10k with me. She agreed, and my training began. Those first few training runs were tough. I don't think that I could run a full mile without walking, and I was okay with that. I was doing more for my body than I had in the past and was determined to finish the race. For my first five mile run, I was in Pittsburgh for the weekend, so Abby and I were going to run together. We went to a trail near her house and took off. At one point, I looked at her and told her that I did not think I would survive. It was the most brutalizing thing I had endured. She kept encouraging me, and I finished. This run showed me that I had a lot of work to do as a runner, but I also learned that I had something inside of me that I didn't know existed. I had determination and perseverance. On race day, I finished the race, which I felt was a small miracle, and decided that I could complete a half marathon. This was coming from a girl that NEVER enjoyed running. I still didn't enjoy running, but I loved how I felt after crossing that finish line. I proved to myself that I could do something I NEVER dreamed of accomplishing. Abby agreed to do my first half-marathon with me, and the training began. My first was over 6 years ago, and I still remember that feeling of crossing the finish line. I was so excited to get my medal and foil. I was on top of the world. I had just ran 13.1 miles and didn't quit. There were many times along the route that I wanted to give up! I couldn't breathe, I was overheating, I had stomach cramps, you name it. Even though things weren't going my way, there was no way I was going to stop. I had just committed the last 12 weeks of my life to accomplishing the goal of crossing that finish line. It wasn't fast or pretty, BUT I did it! I swore that would be the last half I ever ran because my body ached, and I didn't think I could endure another training plan. Well, I changed my mind. Since then, I have ran 4 other half-marathons and will be running my sixth on Sunday.

      Why did I keep running? At first, I kept running because I saw changes in my body. I lost some weight and started seeing muscles that I hadn't seen since I was a collegiate athlete. I was determined to get my weight under 200, and I knew that I could do it if I kept running. The number on the scale kept going down, and I was pleased with the results. Eventually running became so much more than a weight loss tool. I loved being part of community of complete strangers than encouraged me on race day. People shouted words of encouragement and gave high fives as I ran past them. I started seeing the same faces at races and started making friends. My training runs became my sanity and way to decompress after a long day at work. It was my time to spend with my thoughts and get lost in the sounds of nature or music. Running became my therapy! Besides being therapeutic, running gives me a chance to set goals out of my comfort zone and push myself both physically and mentally.    

       In the past, the goals that I have set for myself required a little bit more effort and work than a previous race. I've always tried to set the bar a little bit higher in order to push myself. With that being said, I set a goal for Sunday's race that scares me. I want to run my half under two hours. That means that I need to take at least 5 minutes off my time from last year. There are some days that I know that I can get under 2, and others I second guess myself. The first step in meeting this goal was to make sure that I worked out all winter in order to make my legs and core stronger. In order to do this, I completed Insanity Max 30. This program definitely pushed me and helped me get stronger. I'm not going to lie; there were many days that I did not want to push play! Once actual training started, I knew that I had to up my game and take on a new training plan. I decided to go with Hal Higdon's Intermediate plan. This planned frightened me because it included speed work. I had never done speed work in the past and wasn't sure if it was something that I could do correctly. Deep down I knew that I had to step out of my comfort zone if I wanted to meet my goal. Let me tell you; I am not sure if I will ever do another speed workout again. They kick my butt and leave me completely exhausted. I'm hoping that they will pay off come race day.
     As race day approaches, my mind keeps filling with self-doubt even though I've followed my training plan and put in extra miles along the way. I always tell others to trust in their training, but I am having a hard time following my own advice. I should be heading into the race filled with confidence since I have ran my fastest 5k, 5 miler, and 8 miler races to date during this training period, but I am not. I keep thinking about all of the things that could go wrong instead of the things that can go right. In the back of my mind, I've already started coming up with the excuses I will use if I don't meet my goal. Why do I let my mind go there? I should be focusing on the things I am going to say once I crush my goal. I need to start being my biggest fan and filling myself with positive affirmations. With that being said, I am going to start with: "When someone tells you "you can't", turn around and say "watch me". In my case, I am going to say this to myself whenever that self-doubt creeps into my mind. No matter what happens on Sunday, and I am going to be proud of how far I've come as a runner. I never thought I would run faster than a 10 minute mile, but I have. I never thought I would run a half-marathon, but I have. I never thought I would attempt a full-marathon, but I am going to. Find something that pushes your limits and makes you a better you. For me, it was running, and I am thankful that I had the courage to take those first steps. Were they easy? Not at all!

Invest in Me

       Most of us have or will be getting our tax returns back. Once we get the money back, we usually pay off some bills, put money into a savings account, save money for a vacation, or go on a shopping spree. Do any of these options sound familiar to you? This year I decided to do something a little different. I decided that I am going to invest in ME! I registered for 4 upcoming races, bought a new workout program, and purchased 3 new personal development books.
        My challenge for the next few months is to get my mind right. I've been able to get my workouts as part of my daily routines, and my eating habits have come a long way. The reason for my success is being part of accountability groups on Facebook. This is the route that I am going to go with my mind. I decided to start an accountability group that will focus on reading and discussing "The Gifts of Imperfection: Let go of Who You Think You are Supposed to be and Embrace Who You Are."
         Along with our daily readings, I will provide a weekly meal plan to help with fueling our bodies properly and ask for a daily check in for your workout. This accountability will hopefully keep all of us on track.
         There will be a fee for this 6 week group. With this fee, you will receive your copy of the book and weekly meal plans. Looking forward to going on this journey with YOU! Click here if you are interested in learning more information.The group will be starting on March 16th.

Where have I been?

     It's been awhile since I sat down and wrote a blog. I got caught up in the holiday season and trying to get 2015 started on the right foot. With that being said, I am taking advantage of today's snow day and getting things done!

      My 2015 has started off as planned. I've spent quality time with my boyfriend and daughter checking items off our bucket list. We decided to come up with things that we would like to accomplish this year, so we could make memories together. My daughter is growing up way too fast, and I want to make sure that we are taking advantage of every moment that we have together. We've gone to a Charge Game (minor league for Cavs), Harlem Globetrotters Game, paint balling, and tubing. Who knew all of these activities would be so much fun!! There are still items on our list, and we started adding to it. I love the idea of our bucket list because it gives us an idea of what we can do when we are clueless and looking for ideas. I challenge you and your family to come up with a bucket list. For us, it has challenged us to do things out of our comfort zone that we would not normally do.

       I am in my last week of Insanity Max 30. This program has pushed me beyond anything that I could ever imagine. My body has completed moves that I never dreamed of completing. I have done one arm burpees (my form isn't the greatest) and more push-up variations than I ever dreamed of doing. I feel stronger than I ever have, and I am looking forward to see how it helps improve my running. The most important thing I have learned from this program is to dig deep! Shaun T is constantly encouraging everyone to dig deeper! There have been moments when I have wanted to give up and stop, but I haven't! I dug down and found the energy and motivation to complete the workout.

 

Today I started training for my next half marathon, and I am excited. In the past, I have dreaded training, but I have big goals to accomplish. Plus I get to spend time with my boyfriend on our long runs. When we first ran together in September, I was sure that it was our first and last run. Here we are five months later getting in at least one long run per week. Running with him as pushed me as a runner and given me a new outlook on running. There have been times when I hated running with someone, but now I look forward to our runs. We are both doing something that we love with someone that we love. These runs have definitely made our relationship stronger. Find an activity that will get you and your significant other active together. I promise that it will make your relationship stronger. 

The big news that I am excited to share is my next challenge group called "Love and Luck". It will start on Valentine's Day and run through St. Patrick's Day. For a fee, I will provide you weekly recipes, accountability, motivation, and a place where you can check in and surround yourself with like minded people. You will also get a chance to earn prizes by checking in on a daily basis with at least 30 minutes of exercise and following the 80/20 rule for nutrition. Each day that you check in, your name will be entered for the weekly drawing. Your name will be thrown back in for the grand prize drawing at the end. If you are interested in joining this challenge, click here to sign up. 

Runner status

 

Over six years ago, I took my first steps as a runner. Those first steps were painful and slow. Luckily, I had my sister-in-law by my side. We signed up for several 5ks and truly doubted if we would ever achieve runner status. All of the other runners seemed to have the proper running attire and Garmin watches to keep track of their distance and pace. It was a standing joke between us that we were only posers. After completing several 5ks, I was ready to tackle a 10k. My sister-in-law agreed to do a 10K with my in Cleveland, OH. We signed up, I found a training plan on Hal Higdon's site, and the training began. The race wasn't as bad as I thought it would be, so I decided that I would tackle a half-marathon. Five years ago, I completed my first marathon. Even after completing it, I didn't feel like a runner. I am not sure why! Not everyone can complete a half-marathon. I was going to take some time off after finishing it, but I got the running bug. The next year I completed another half-marathon and took 14 minutes off of my time. I was proud of myself, but I was still searching for confirmation that I was a runner. My sister-in-law signed up for her first marathon, but I knew that I was not ready to tackle that beast. In support of her, I ran 2 half-marathons and once again improved my time. I was logging more miles than I ever had, but I still did not feel like a runner. What was it going to take for me to feel like a runner? I had the Garmin watch and runner attire, I was getting faster, and I was running more, but something was still missing. 

     In November, I started t25, and my running started to improve. I was able to go farther in a shorter amount of time. My friend agreed to do a half-marathon with me in April, and we agreed to do all of our long runs together. This made me a little bit nervous because she was a little bit faster. To my surprise, I was able to keep up with her and carry on a conversation. We agreed that we would each run our own race on race day and meet at the finish line. My goal for was to finish in 2:14. That was 10 minutes faster than my best time. Much to my surprise, I finished in 2:04. BUT I still did not feel like a runner. What was it going to take? When would I feel like a real runner? Since April, I have set three other PRs, but I am still searching for the moment that makes me feel like a runner.

 

     A little over two months ago, I started dating Kevin. In my mind, Kevin was a runner. He has been running for over half his life and can compete with the best of them on race day. On our first date, we talked a lot about running, and I knew right then and there that we would NEVER run together. He asked me a couple of times to join him for a run until I reluctantly agreed. Our first run together was 7 miles of complete torture. I was nervous and trying to keep up with his slow.slow, slow pace and breath at the same time. After we got back, I told him that it was the worst date that I had ever been on and there was no way I would ever join him again. I changed my mind, and we now have a standing date on Sundays. Since we have started our weekly dates, I have gained confidence in my running because he is constantly encouraging me and pushing me to be a better runner. He is convinced that I can do my next half under 2:00. The more he says it; the more I start to believe it. Yesterday we sat and talked about my mileage goal for the rest of the year since I have already surpassed my goal. He convinced me that I could get 100 miles between now and the end of the year. With his support and encouragement, I have decided to run at least a mile each day between now and the end of the year. I guess I am getting that runner's mentality and really starting to believe I AM A RUNNER! 

     Over the weekend, I ran a 5k and PRd. I was excited with a PR since it was extremely cold, windy, and hilly. After I got home, Kevin and I sat down to look at the results. To my surprise. I placed second in my age group. This was something that I never thought would happen. This was confirmation that I AM A RUNNER.

     In recent months, I have really started to see and understand that YOU are runner the minute you lace up your shoes and take those first steps. There aren't qualifications to become a runner besides putting one foot in front of the other. DON'T be like I was and doubt yourself.

It's my birthday

Birthdays have a different meaning as you get older. You never really look forward to the number getting higher after you turn 21. Each year you try to pretend that you are not really XX years old. Why is that? What's wrong with turning another year older? For me, it was another year closer to my daughter graduating from high school and leaving home. It was another year of unhappiness pretending behind a mask.  In the picture on the left, the girl in the top was forcing a smile and wasn't truly happy. She was going through the motions of life pretending for the sake of herself and others. The girl in the bottom is truly happy for the first time in a long time. She loves who she is on the inside and out! There are so many changes inside that others do not realize. She can truly loves herself and wants to teach others to do the same thing.  I am looking forward to my 38th year because I know that big things are in store for me. There are goals to accomplish and lives to change. From now on, I am going to embrace every year that I am given because it could be my last. I am going to make the most of it and cherish each and every day!
     The celebration for my birthday started on Saturday with a special date planned by my boyfriend. It still feels weird saying that because I haven't had a boyfriend in over 10 years. The reason that I was finally able to agree to a blind date was because I love myself again and have self-confidence.

No matter how it went; I was able to step out of my comfort zone and be me. Luckily, he leads a similar lifestyle and gets my addiction to exercise and eating healthy. He was able to see the girl that I am now and not the girl that was shattered for so long. His support and encouragement has been amazing. He pushes me on our long training runs and builds me up when I am down. I never understood how important it was to have someone that supports you in your journey until he came into my life. I thank God every day for bringing him into my life! It is truly important to have someone that is going to support you in your endeavors and will tolerate all of your crazy ideas! It is so much easier to stay the course when you have someone in your corner that will encourage you through the tough times and celebrate with you through the good times.

I am currently in training for a 10 mile race; whenever I am in training, I usually give up sweets, alcohol, and bread. I want to focus on putting good fuels into my body. I went back and forth all day long trying to decide if I would have a drink and dessert with my birthday dinner. My best friend reminded me during our run that it was my birthday weekend, and I deserved a day of indulgences. I still wasn't 100% sure if I was going to have the courage to order either one at dinner. Kevin is very supportive of my lifestyle and knew that I might not indulge even though we were eating at a winery. I looked at the drink menu, sampled a couple of wines, and tasted his drink. It was delicious, so I ordered one. It was a caramel apple sangria. Before ordering dinner, I made a comment about wanting to try the sweet popcorn. When I went to the restroom, he ordered it for me, and it was waiting when I got back. It was everything that I hoped it would be. I didn't beat myself up because I know that all things in moderation will not hurt you! Unfortunately, I have to be an all or nothing girl because I am not good at moderation. It is something that I need to work on. Sunday was a Hibachi lunch with the family. Once again, I overindulged just a little bit, but I will be back on track today. Here's to my 38th year and all that it will bring. I am excited to see what it has in store for me. Next time you celebrate YOUR birthday I hope that you are looking forward to another year. We never know when it will be our last. By making little changes to my diet and exercise routine, I was able to find myself again.
  

Stepping out of my box

        Since starting my journey, I have been working on stepping out of my comfort zone when it comes to workouts, runs, recipes, activities, and life. I was comfortable in the status quo and convinced myself that I was ok with my life as it was going.  This was the path that I had decided on since high school: go to college, get a degree, and become a teacher. The only hiccup along the way was getting pregnant for Jadynn my senior year. After having her, I jumped right back on the path to becoming a teacher. Luckily, I found a job right out of college and started my fifteenth year of teaching. I love what I do and look forward to work most days, like everyone else. Until January, I was going through the motions of life. I no longer dreamed, I no longer lived for me, I no longer put myself first, and I no longer loved myself.
         When I signed up to be a Beachbody coach, I had no idea what I would gain from it. My intentions were to hold myself accountable and possibly help others along the way. Boy was I wrong! Through all of the books I have read for personal development and groups I have joined, I realized that I needed to start dreaming again and put myself first. If I take care of me, I am going to be a better mother, sister, aunt, friend, and teacher. I have started to love myself again and thinking about what I want to do with my life.

Right now, I am reading "Start" by Jon Acuff. In his book, he talks about living an average life in comparison to an awesome life. He discusses that most of us settle for the average life because that it was we are taught to do. There is the master plan for life that all of us tend to follow, and we lose sight of being awesome. As a child, we are on the path to be awesome, but someone convinces to jump on the path to the average life. This got me thinking about my own life and what I am doing to my daughter. Am I making her jump on the path to an average life when she could be awesome? I really want to support her in her dreams, but what happens if they bring her nothing but heartache? It is such a fine line to walk. I am committed to helping both of us finding the path to awesome. The first step is to figure out where we are now and embrace the surprises that we find along the way.
            I have been an athlete my entire life and love being active. With

that being said, I truly enjoy working out and running. But I have never pushed my limits until this year. I truly feel like a runner for the first time in 5 years. My times are getting faster and faster, and I love doing long runs with a partner because I can run and talk with ease. I always made excuses for not pushing myself during workouts when something was too hard. Now I just do the best that I can do. FINALLY, I can do big girl push-ups and push through workouts. I am done making excuses.
            Nutrition is still my biggest struggle, but I am learning to step outside my comfort zone and try new foods. There are some things that I eat now that I used to turn my nose at in the past. I cook more and firmly believe in meal planning and prepping. My pallet is changing, and I can truly say I enjoy trying new foods. This weekend I tried two new recipes for my breakfast and lunch this week.

Since it is Fall, I felt that it was time to make pumpkin chocolate chip muffins. I found the recipe on Skinnytaste. If you would like it, click here. I used whole wheat flour and Truvia in my batch. For lunch, I am having Mexican quinoa. Quinoa is a new staple in my diet, and I am always looking for a new way to make it. I tried this recipe because I love Mexican food. It was delicious. Here is the recipe that I used:
1 pound ground turkey seasoned with cumin and chili powder
1 cup of cooked quinoa
1 can of black beans (rinsed)
1 can of corn (rinsed)
1 1/2 cups of salsa

Mix everything in a glass baking dish and sprinkle cheese of your choice on top. Bake at 350 degrees for 30 minutes.
          I look back over the last 9 months, and I am so glad that I decided to start stepping outside of my box. Life is a different, but I love it. I cannot wait to find the path to awesome and what that looks like for me. Don't be afraid to step out of your box!!

What's this 21 Day Fix all about?!?

My nutrition has always been a thorn in my side since starting my journey. I started with simply counting calories without realizing that there was a difference between good and bad calories. As long as I stayed under my calories, I was a happy a girl! Then I started educating myself about the different types of calories and what "clean" eating was all about. I started learning that low calorie and fat free were doing more harm to my body than good. Skinnytaste became my best friend, and I started whipping up recipes. I finally found my home in the kitchen and felt like I was Julia Childs. Even with these changes, I wasn't getting the results that I was expecting. What was I doing wrong? I started realizing that my portions were out of control, and I wasn't always eating all of the right foods.
     Enter the 21 Day Fix- I was super excited for this program because it was the answer to my prayers. It was going to tell me what to eat and how much I could have of each group. When I first got the program, I thought that I was going to starve because the containers were so small. I found out that I needed to eat a lot more vegetables and my love, carbs, were going to be minimal. I was determined to make this program work, so I swallowed my doubts and forged on. On the first day, I was completely shocked at how much food I was able to eat. I couldn't even eat all of the containers. I realized that I needed to plan and prep a little bit more than I did if I wanted to be successful. There were many days that I cheated and didn't follow the plan. It was full of trial and error and figuring out what foods I liked to eat and adapt to the idea of eating the same thing all week.
     I just recently completed my fourth round of the "fix". This was my most successful round because I finally had the program figured out. I knew what I needed to do to be successful. The key was figuring out my food ahead of time, putting my workouts in my planner, figuring out new ways to get vegetables in my day, and finding someone to hold me accountable. This time around I lost 7.6 pounds! The trick is going to be figuring out way to keep up the habits that I developed and stick to it. If you are interested in hearing more about the basics of the program, listen to my Youtube video.

Buddha Bowl: 1 yellow, 1 red, 1 green

Whole grain wrap with scrambled eggs with spinach and mushrooms
1 yellow, 1 red, 1 green